Pacing & Leading | NLP Persuasion & Influence
THE SCIENCE OF SUCCESS
PACING & LEADING
Pacing and Leading is a popular Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) technique designed to establish rapport and induce social compliance. Neuro Linguistic programming is a psychological technology that Richard Bandler and John Grinder developed in the late 1970’s & has it’s roots in Hypnosis. NLP, as a model for self-help, is becoming increasingly popular thanks to Self Help gurus like Anthony Robbins and continues to grow and evolve. Dec 1, 2013
Pacing & Leading can be thought of as a single tool, designed for a single purpose, not dissimilar to a flat head screwdriver. However, as we have all most likely experienced, much like the screwdriver, NLP is not only used for which it is was intended, although there is ONLY one purpose for which it is typically taught by me.
Therefore, the PURPOSE of Pacing & Leading is to create “RAPPORT” (syn. understanding, empathy, bond ALSO syn. Seduction, Persuasion, Influence, Convince) between the OBSERVER and a SUBJECT or a GROUP of SUBJECTS who wish to communicate openly and productively toward a clear and well-defined goal*.
*For more information on forming well-formed outcomes & goals refer back to the article on the 4 stages of the learning process by clicking HERE.
HOW/WHY THIS TOOL WORKS
Because we are social creatures, and our survival has depended upon social cooperation, we have developed certain behavioral patterns to help make that process easier and increasingly more efficient for survival of our species. One of those systems is the necessity to translate data into “chunks” of easily stored data, and because we speak language, but not identically to one another, as we have demonstrated throughout this course, we as primates, translate data in the form of language, (both body language and verbal Linguistics) into a format that we can store quickly and easily known as the “Gist” or the overview and summary of the conversation or content.
Pacing & Leading is a communication tool designed to “feedback” or (PACE) the experience of what is happening, and once rapport is demonstrably evident, (in NLP called calibration) using the (Pace) to then link what is being experienced across to a (LEAD) or what is “desired” as an outcome as if the two were interconnected when they are typically not necessarily contingent upon one another in actuality.
This is most typically seen in cases where the OBSERVER understands and clearly reciprocates the linguistic patterns and social behavioral patterns most agreeable to the SUBJECT & in so doing can use this system to follow the behaviors of the subject (PACING) while simultaneously using these same words and behaviors to direct the goal of the conversation through strategic Linguistic “Bridge-Phrases” (PRESUPPOSITION) to a specific outcome (LEADING.) We can clearly demonstrate this concept with a simple formula:
(Repeat until Well-Formed Goal is achieved AND Confirmed)
FORMULA: This “formula,” is not a technical formula, but rather a social compliance force multiplier. You must develop Steps 1 & 5 first. (2 – will change; 3 – will change; 4 – should be EXACT, SPECIFIC, & Well-formed)
- 1- Developing a Well-Formed Outcome (Use the PURE Model)
- 2- Pacing WHAT IS HAPPENING or any Agreed upon Variable becomes a Causal Phrase connecting to the next Pace which is another Cause>Effect Phrase
- 3 – SECONDARY Agreed upon Variable or WHAT IS also HAPPENING linked together as the effect or as a secondary and supportive cause
- 4 – Variable you want to be agreed upon (Well-Formed Outcome)
- 5 – Confirming Compliance
*Presupposition or “Bridge Phrases:” a thing tacitly assumed beforehand at the beginning of a line of argument or course of action.
(+ /-) Presupposition: Bridge Phrase “As you,” “and as,” “this makes you, etc.”
Agreeable accompanying bridge phrases are vivid and use interactive metaphors, parables, analogies, and details. i.e.
(Body language is powerful, POSSIBLY the most powerful form of pacing ie “2” could be introduced or preceded by a fist bump, or handshake, or a hug, or a tap on the elbow; remember this is a social skill and requires sensory acuity also known as EQ development)
Example Script: “As you NOW begin to notice the sounds in the room and the faint hums of fans and machines or bodies whirring distantly and nearby, you may also find this revelation quite agreeable and comforting. I want you to begin to notice how easily you NOW begin to access memories and vivid descriptive words AND stories that have impacted you and changed your life in more ways than one could comprehend. . .”
NOTE: Humans delete and distort info; If it doesn’t fit into a category, BUT seems like a belief RATHER than an exercise in thought, we need them to THINK, NOT REMEMBER what they believe before THINKING. Often humans spend their time REMEMBERING unsupported beliefs and THINKING that remembering is a new original THOUGHT.
*Modify these phrases to be able to utilize them comfortably and naturally, BUT do not remove any of the COMMANDS
COGNITIVE PROCESSING PHRASES:
Note: You may find that you are most effective when you Begin (Pacing) and End (Leading) with THESE
*Words that access a person’s learning capacity OR WORDS that open the mind of others
- “Create,” etc. . .
BRIDGE PHRASES OR CAUSE AND EFFECT PHRASES:
- “And AS you,”
- “FORCES you to,”
- “MAKES you,”
- “CAUSES you to. . .”
BELIEF BUILDING/DESTROYING PHRASES:
- “How do you know,”
- “Maybe not,”
- “Are you sure?”
- “Play with (as in “the idea of” or “concept”)
- “Allow that”
- “Go Ahead”
- “Naturally, you will”
It will take practice and research to be able to utilize this Linguistic Skillset in Sales, Therapeutic applications, and Leadership modalities. If you want to speed up that process, you might consider hiring a Coach or NLP Trainer for your Group, Corporation, or Personal Development. Please watch the following videos for elaboration and demonstrations.
JAMES PESCH WELCOMES YOU BACK!
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